In Jen Pastiloff’s retreats and workshops, she has a prompt that asks: What are you saying “yes” to?
In our lives, we say no to so much. Fear, anxiety, and depression keep us from saying yes even when we want to, and I am no stranger to saying no because yes is far too scary sometimes.
Since the last time I wrote, my world has been turned upside-down. Those that know why, thank you for being there. Those that don’t yet know, you will, in time.
If that seems too vague and like something an asshole would say, that could be accurate. But there are times where we deal with things that are so painful that the only way to start talking about them is with ambiguous sweeping statements like the ones I just typed above.
But this isn’t a post to write nebulous statements that make little sense. This is a post to help battle the demons I face every day. A post to say, “Fuck off, demons. Today I am saying yes, and I’m not afraid or anxious about doing that.” Tomorrow may be different; but today is today.
Today I am saying yes to:
– Holding space and saying a silent prayer for everyone who’s hurting right now.
– Saying please and thank you.
– Not worrying about laundry and cleaning my house
– Belly laughing
– Greeting my boys with a monster hug when I pick them up from school
– Not comparing myself to strangers on the internet
– Seriously, I will not compare myself to strangers on the internet
– Making time to call my grandmothers
– Belly rubs for my dogs. Shit, and our cat, too.
– Writing more, even if I think it’s terrible.
And last, but certainly not least:
– The launch of my website redesign (Thank you Goebel Media Group team!)
I know each day is different. Tomorrow I may only be able to say yes to two or three things. But these are October 5th’s yeses.
What are you saying yes to today?
I love this Ashley! Today I am saying YES to being fearless and putting these words representing myself out there in a public space, YES to seeing myself and others through accepting eyes and an open heart, and YES to putting love first so I can act out of love and show it. While these appear to be simple statements, I know you empathize with how difficult these little yet big things can be. It’s all too easy to be an asshole to myself, judge myself harshly, and keep myself stuck in a cycle of fear, yet not today.